Half Man Half Biscuit - Thy Damnation Slumbereth Not Chords

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   I?m gonna grab myself an industry insider mask and blag my way into the aftershow.


I wanna get in amongst the baying hordes of resting actors

Who?ve just got back from visiting Nairobi slums for Comic Relief

And now they?re gonna spend the next six weeks sitting in the vestibule

Waiting for the Farmfoods phone call. The Farmfoods phone call.


I?m gonna be apprehended by some mandatory galoot with a handheld camera

Who?ll point it in my face and say: ?Who are you, and what do you do??

And I?ll say ?I?m a counterblast to Agnosticism ? how do you do?

And he?ll go away immediately.

I wanna meet Howard Marks if I can but they say that I can?t

I need four different wristbands.
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Follow me oh follow, down to the hollow, and there we will wallow.

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  There?s a Britpop refugee, walking up to me and his face is hollow from seasons of disappointment

And he starts blathering on about his latest project

Already being dismissed by the most unlikeliest of cable stations:

It?s a dot com sit com, about a hip hop chip shop.
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Chatto and Windus sitting in a tree d-i-s-s-i-n-g Keith Allen?s autobiography.

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  I?m just trying to break the drudgery of the downstairs maid

I?m just trying to write the sort of tune you could maybe hum 

While waiting for your lover on a railway platform.

I wanna meet Howard Marks if I can but they say that I can?t.
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Follow me oh follow, down to the hollow, and there we will wallow.

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  I want to perch myself halfway up a metal staircase with the Polydor Girls and talk about meerkats

And come out with statements like

?Well of course music these days is the slave of mammon and as a result it has become corrupt and shallow

Its real essence is industry; its moral purpose is the acquisition of money;

Its aesthetic pretext is the entertainment of those who are bored.

So yes, we?re really excited about going back into the studio

Hotly tipped, highly anticipated and slated? for release?.

I wanna meet Howard Marks if I can but they say that I can?t

He?s talking to Ian Broudie.

(N.C.)
And come four o?clock if I?m still on my feet
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There?s a bloke over there who said I could meet?????.. Ken Livingstone.


Well I?m just a primitive creature of the heath so excuse my savage ignorance

But if I?m still on my feet at four o?clock I?ll be stealing the lead off the roof.
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Follow me oh follow, down to the hollow, and there we will wallow.

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Stealing the lead off the roof, stealing the lead off the roof
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Stealing the lead off the roof, stealing the lead off the roof.
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Come saddle my milk white steed, I?ve seen much more than I need
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And I know that you won?t heed the call, so I sprayed it onto the wall.

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Thy damnation slumbereth not, thy damnation slumbereth not
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Thy damnation slumbereth not, thy damnation slumbereth not.