Eminem - Criminal Chords

   Em              C#dim           C               Em     

e|---------------------3-------3-------3-------3-------------------|
B|-----8-------8-------5-------5-------5-------5-------8-------8---|
G|-----9-------9-------6-------6-------5-------5-------9-------9---|
D|-----9-------9---------------------------------------9-------9---|
A|-7-------7-7-----4-------4-4-----3-------3-3-----7-------7-7-----|
E|-----------------------------------------------------------------|

I rated it intermediate, because C#dim is quite difficult to get on so fast :)


[Eminem]
A lot of people ask me.. stupid f**king questions
A lot of people think that.. what I say on records
or what I talk about on a record, that I actually do in real life
or that I believe in it
Or if I say that, I wanna kill somebody, that..
I'm actually gonna do it
or that I believe in it
Well, sh*t.. if you believe that
then I'll kill you
You know why?
Cause I'm a

Em         C#dim
CRIMINAL
C
CRIMINAL
Em
You god damn right
Em              C#dim
I'm a CRIMINAL
            C            Em
Yeah, I'm a CRIMINAL

[Eminem]
Em
My words are like a dagger with a jagged edge

C#dim
That'll stab you in the head
whether you're a fag or lez

C
Or the homosex, hermaph or a trans-a-vest

Em
Pants or dress - hate fags? The answer's "yes"
Homophobic? Nah, you're just heterophobic

C#dim
Staring at my jeans, watching my genitals bulging (Ooh!)

C
That's my motherf**king balls, you'd better let go of em

Em
They belong in my scrotum, you'll never get hold of em
Hey, it's me, Versace
Whoops, somebody shot me!

C#dim
And I was just checking the mail
Get it? Checking the 'male'?

C
How many records you expecting to sell

Em
after your second LP sends you directly to jail?
C'mon!-- Relax guy, I like gay men

C#dim
Right, Ken? Give me an amen (AAA-men!)

C
Please Lord, this boy needs Jesus

Em
Heal this child, help us destroy these demons
Oh, and please send me a brand new car

C#dim
And a prostitute while my wife's sick in the hospital

C
Preacher preacher, fifth grade teacher

Em
You can't reach me, my mom can't neither
You can't teach me a goddamn thing cause

C#dim
I watch TV, and Comcast cable

C
and you ain't able to stop these thoughts

Em
You can't stop me from topping these charts
And you can't stop me from dropping each March

C#dim
with a brand new CD for these f**king retards

C
Duhhh, and to think, it's just little ol' me

Em
Mr. "Don't Give A f**k," still won't leave

[Chorus: Eminem (repeat 2X)]

      Em
I'm a CRIMINAL

                                                            C#dim
Cause every time I write a rhyme, these people think it's a crime

                                             C
to tell em what's on my mind - I guess I'm a CRIMINAL

                                               Em
but I don't gotta say a word, I just flip em the bird
and keep going, I don't take sh*t from no one

[Eminem]

Em
My mother did drugs - hard-liquor, cigarettes, and speed

C#dim
The baby came out - disfigured, ligaments indeed

C
It was a seed who would grow up just as crazy as she

Em
Don't dare make fun of that baby cause that baby was me
I'm a CRIMINAL - an animal caged who turned crazed

C#dim
But how the f**k you supposed to grow up when you weren't raised?

C
So as I got older and I got a lot taller

Em
My dick shrunk smaller, but my balls got larger
I drink more liquor to f**k you up quicker

C#dim
than you'd wanna f**k me up for saying the word ...

C
My morals went thhbbpp when the president got oral

Em
Sex in his Oval Office on top of his desk
Off of his own employee
Now don't ignore me, you won't avoid me

C#dim
You can't miss me, I'm white, blonde-haired
and my nose is pointy

C
I'm the bad guy who makes fun of people that die

Em
in plane crashes and laughs
As long as it ain't happened to him
Slim Shady, I'm as crazy as Em

C#dim
-inem and Kim combined - [*kch*] the maniac's in

C
Replacing the doctor cause Dre couldn't make it today

Em
He's a little under the weather, so I'm taking his place
(Mm-mm-mmm!) Oh, that's Dre with an AK to his face

C#dim
Don't make me kill him too and spray his brains all over the place

C
I told you Dre, you should've kept that thang put away

Em
I guess that'll teach you not to let me play with it, eh?
I'm a CRIMINAL

(Just play the chords while they interlude)


[Interlude Skit]
Aight look (uh huh) just go up in that motherf**ker
get the motherf**king money and get the f**k up outta there
[Eminem] Aight
I'll be right here waiting on you
[Eminem] Aight
Yo Em
[Eminem] What?!
Don't kill nobody this time
[Eminem] Awwright... god damn, f**k...
(whistling) how you doin'?
[Teller] HI, how can I help you?
[Eminem] Yeah I need to make a withdrawl
[Teller] Okay
[Eminem] Put the f**king money in the bag b**ch
and I won't kill you!
[Teller] What? Oh my god, don't kill me
[Eminem] I'm not gonna kill you b**ch, quit looking around...
[Teller] Don't kill me, please don't kill me...
[Eminem] I said I'm not gonna f**king kill you
Hurry the f**k up! [*BOOM*] Thank you!


[Eminem]

Em
Windows tinted on my ride when I drive in it

C#dim
So when I rob a bank, run out and just dive in it

C
So I'll be disguised in it

                          Em
And if anybody identifies the guy in it
I'll hide for five minutes
Come back, shoot the eyewitness

C#dim
Fire at the private eye hired to pry in my business

C
Die, b**ches, bastards, brats, pets

Em
This puppy's lucky I didn't blast his ass yet [*dog whines*]
If I ever gave a f**k, I'd shave my nuts

C#dim
tuck my dick in between my legs and cluck

C
You motherf**king chickens ain't brave enough

Em
to say the stuff I say, so just tape it shut [*tape unrolls*]
sh*t, half the sh*t I say, I just make it up

C#dim
To make you mad so kiss my white naked ass

C
And if it's not a rapper that I make it as

Em
I'ma be a f**king rapist in a Jason mask

Chorus * 2