Cledus T Judd - Motel Californie Chords

Motel Californie
parody of "Hotel California" by Henley/Frey/Felder
New lyrics by Judd/Sarenana
1/8/06
NOTE: Thanks to EMRLDEYZS for her great tab.
      I couldn't understand some of the lyrics.   Corrections welcome.


CAPO II


INTRO: Am  E7  G  D  F  C  Dm  E7


SPOKEN OVER INTRO:
Yay! Alright.  Way to go!  Ooh!
Ooh! Way to--oh, yeah!  Oh, what was that?

Am                         E7
On a dark country highway, in my candy apple Corvair
G                         D
A strong smell of Cledus, need to change underwear
F                         C
Up ahead in the distance, I saw a sickenin' sight
Dm                                       E7
My tank near empty and the lights is dim, I reckon I'll stop for the night


The sign out front said "vacancy" so I punched a bell
Dog mess everywhere I stepped, holy cow oh my God what a smell
Then she fired up a lantern and she showed me her face
False teeth in an old fruit jar, I thought I heard them say


CHORUS:
F                        C
Welcome to the Motel Californie
        E7                                    Am
Such an ugly (such an ugly place) filled with toxic waste
F                                   C
Ain't but one room at the Motel Californie
          Dm                                              E7
Man this place weird (man this place is weird), gosh I'm really skeered


The faucets weren't price fister, oh! scorched my contact lense
The hot said cold and the cold said hot, the wall heater burned the hair off my shins
My room resembled a scr*p yard from a busted up TV set
Rain was blowin' thru my winders, now my bed's soakin' wet


Then I called up room service for a cheeseburger and fries
That thing tasted like it'd been cooked back in 1969
You could hear my gas exploding from far away
Woke up the clerk in the middle of the night, I swore I heard her say


CHORUS:
Have you enjoyed your stay at the Motel Californie
Oh I ain't feelin' (he an't feelin' well) 'cause the room sure smells
She said we give it our best at the Motel Californie
Surely you got some rest (hope you got some rest) hell I broke the desk


Stalagtites from the ceilin, thermostat covered in ice
Then I prayed God I long for a Holiday Inn, or a Motel 6 would be nice
Went to the old maid's chambers, for a clean change of sheets
Somebody stabbed her with an old buck knife, she was cold dead yeah deceased


Last I remember I busted down my room door
Feelin' nautious as my stomach churned from the scene I'd just seen before
Took some X-Lax from the nightstand, here on the toilet I sit
As soon as I get my big butt up from here I'm gonna call up Tom Bodett



INTRO out